Continued...
- I’ve messed up but they’re still okay. I haven’t done it perfectly. Still, there’s been plenty of great times, and those outweigh the tough ones. That matters. So, on the days I get it wrong, we talk about it. We listen to each other. We hug and forgive. Then we try again. When you can release the weight of guilt and accept forgiveness, the load is so much more bearable. To the mom who is too hard on herself, you’re good enough. Aim for connection instead of perfection. Perfection isn’t attainable but connection heals.
- I can’t be everything and do everything. A lot of heaviness comes from trying to do and BE too much. The kids can put the laundry in. Dad can make dinner. The grandparents can keep them for a night. Someone else can volunteer for lunch duty at school. I don’t win a trophy for overextending myself and stressing myself out. So when the heaviness settles in, I take a look at my schedule and my responsibilities. What needs cut gets cut, what needs delegated gets delegated. When I stop trying to be Wonder Woman, I can be quite wonderful. See what I did there?
Sometimes there’s nothing you can do but feel the heaviness and breathe through it until it passes. Sometimes you can’t fix it. But sometimes, with a little tweaking, a fresh perspective, and a whole lot of grace, you can.
Rebecca Eanes is the bestselling author of multiple books including Positive Parenting: An Essential Guide, The Positive Parenting Workbook, and The Gift of a Happy Mother. She is the grateful mom of two boys.
