Continued...

• Keep showing acceptance and unconditional love. Again, this is not acceptance of all behaviors and attitudes but acceptance of the human being. You may dislike his taste in music or her fashion sense, but harping on it feels like rejection, not advice.
• Avoid the carrot and stick model as relying heavily on rewards and punishments is damaging to the relationship. Instead, work with your child to find positive solutions to problems.

Remember, independence and connection can and must coexist! It’s normal and healthy for a teen to become more and more independent, but it’s not healthy for her to push her parents away. That’s a sign of disconnection and a dangerous road for a teen to travel. The daily demands make it difficult to stay close, but if we make it top priority, it will happen. Keeping our teens’ hearts mean we have to keep reconnecting every single day and showing our unwavering love always.

Other posts in this series:

Building Great Relationships in Infancy and Early Childhood

Building Great Relationships in Middle Childhood

Rebecca Eanes is the bestselling author of multiple books including Positive Parenting: An Essential Guide, The Positive Parenting Workbook, and The Gift of a Happy Mother. She is the grateful mom of two boys.